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HITMAN : absolution


what do u think about hitman: absolution?  

17 members have voted

  1. 1. what do u think about hitman: absolution?

    • GREAT
      3
    • SHIT
      2
    • its ok, so-so average
      7
    • i didn't buy it
      5


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A man with nothing to lose... a man looking for a girl....walks the path of a wanted man

he delves into shadows,climbs walls,buildings,uses many gadgets to stay unseen,

and when he is in trouble,he uses the environment against his enemies...the man is.....sam fish...---------ok ok ok ..wait a minute,

this is a hitman review...WTF switch?splinter hell?

 

switch: my friend...in absolution 47 is dead, sam fisher went on to become a monk after the last game....

he has now come back from tibet with a bald head, trying to save his other daughter vici-chuwan..oh and he faps to images of naked Diana all the time..in other words SHITMAN : conviction

 

hi guys, i received the new hitman game yesterday morning, through express air mail....(i spent more than 100 bux for just delivery...im living outside U.S)

anyway after the expensive pocket rape by DHL, i was excited to play my beloved bald guy,running around poisoning ponies

as you all know im a professional pirate, but I ALWAYS buy the original hitman games , bcuz me and my bro are major fans

i have many figures,posters,goodies,and limited editions of hitman games at my parent's house,im a hitman fanatic so to say

 

however the new hitman,was like fapping to "fail" tentacle rape...its got good graphics but its just "fail" (u kno tat feel,im sure)

why is it a fail?well many reasons, when i finished the game on the most easy difficulty,i thought "what was that? splinter cell?"

i then played the highest difficulty...still splinter cell, i checked the game box to see if the maker is lo interactive and NOT ubisoft...

it wan lo interactive + gaynicks = interact with gay nikcs

 

in easy difficulty you run around from A to B, then cutscene,then mission complete

in the highest difficulty, you take cover for 6 hours waiting for the guard to go, you then move for 3mm before being exposed

 

at this point you have 2 options :

1.restart from checkpoint (this means u gotta play for an eternity to get here again)

2.all guns blazing ( u r playing modern warfare , with a bald guy in 3rd person view)

 

absolution has strayed from its path,it has lost the creativity factor of other hitmen,

it is a shadow of its former fapworthiness

in blood money u could kill ur target in at least 4 different ways, in absolution you go from one place to another,then

ur target is killed in a cutscene....and its always the same cutscene ,whether u go ghost or rambo style there is no fucking difference

 

the instinct system is crap...thats for a shooter not a stealth game, also i hate the fact that i dont get to put bombs in a cake to kill my target..i loved killing ba man on his wedding day....then fapping to his bride

the fact that i have to take cover....and wait till christmas to reach a fucking door...just to see a naked diana in bath..

 

anyway i want ur thoughts and opinions on SHITMAN : absolution :)

Edited by switch
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Couldn't care less, I didn't paid a penny for it so I get what I get :p

 

Still entertaining until I get my hands on Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch

 

That said, never trust IGN, Metacritic, GameSpot and even Gameinformer for reviews, they all get paid to give away good reviews.

 

http://politetimesplitter.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/ignea.gif

Edited by Ryu
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i miss the days when i used to hide in a bush...the guy shows up in front of the grave...i shoot him...and he falls dead in the grave

or killing a guy while delivering pizza....i miss those days...i miss the real splinter cell, the real gears of war and the real hitman

let us mourn their loss..

btw EA games you suck bieber's pussy hairs...bcuz fuk u tats why

 

^bcuz one does not simply criticize games without insulting EA....

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